The Sickness

My mind does weird things when I'm sick. I think it has something to do with the temperature of my overall body and how it's so much higher than it ought to be for normal healthy human standards. So when I sleep at night, I have crazy dreams, that don't necessarily stop when I wake up.

Last night, among other things, I dreamed that I was playing a game that I used to play a lot, Counter-Strike, except I actually was the first person character. I was winning, absolutely destroying the competition time and time again, to the point where one guy on the other team took a particular disliking to me and decided to hunt me down every round. He never got me though, and I kept stealing his gun from him. Then my brother in law was on the other team and I kept shooting him and trying to stab his head but he wouldn't die.

When I woke up I wasn't sure if I was still playing or not; or if I had to go pee or not; or if I wanted to get out of bed at all.

The scariest thing was deciding that no, I wasn't going to get out of bed and then finding myself wandering around the living room for no particular purpose, not at all remembering getting out of bed.

I also dreamed of playing my bass and of Lori, and I prayed a lot though I don't remember why or what.

I do remember sitting on the toilet at one point, fully aware that this was one of the worst nights in my life, perhaps second to that time I puked 13 times, though for some reason that ended up being fun near the end.

Being sick sucks. I had to cancel on playing bass for chapel today, had to call in a favor from a friend to take my place, have to wait and see if I'm going to class (probably not), have to wait for my dad to show up though he's supposed to be here 30 minutes ago, makes me wonder if the buzzer is not working again, etc.

I don't know why I'm writing this or what I've writing, my head hurts. G'night.